I know exactly what it's like to have lived experience seeking help from our trauma and addiction recovery system only to not get better despite trying for nearly a decade, to find alternative paths to alcohol recovery, to get better in just 3 short months, to stay recovered ever since and to go on to take a seat on the other side of the table and become an expert in the very field I once sought help from.
Here's my story of how after nearly a decade I found the path of alcohol recovery that actually worked for me.
I Began Drinking But Soon Realized I Had a Problem
I began drinking alcohol in college at college parties, with drinking games, and it was really fun.
A few years after though, drinking alcohol turned from something I just did because it was the thing to do to me losing complete control.
I soon realized that each time I started drinking I couldn’t stop and the days I wasn’t drinking the strong thoughts and cravings for alcohol came in and out all day, every day until I began drinking again.
So, eventually I sought out help for this. I didn’t know that this would be the beginning of a nearly decade-long struggle that I had no chance of winning.
I Earnestly Sought Help But Failed Miserably Every Single Time For Nearly a Decade
I sought help from therapists, doctors, support groups such as AA and Celebrate Recovery, I had an accountability partner, I went to the front of church after service for prayer, I journaled praying and begging God for the answer and to heal me, and more.
Everyone had 1 answer for me and 1 answer only though, and that was if I could not moderate my alcohol consumption and through nothing but sheer willpower by the way, then I had to abstain from alcohol for the rest of my life, and again through nothing but sheer willpower.
So, even though it seemed widely unfair that I could not drink like a “normal person”, I earnestly tried, but I failed miserably every single time.
There were times when I was able to have stretches of time where I abstained from alcohol, but eventually those strong and obsessive thoughts and cravings for alcohol won every single time and I picked up drinking alcohol like no time had passed at all. I was right back to it.
I suffered in this pattern for nearly a decade.
I Found Another Path of Recovery, I Wanted to Try It, But No One Would Help Me
One day though, I came across a TED Talk and the speaker claimed to have found the cure to alcoholism.
At first, I thought what she was sharing was completely too good to be true, that I just take 1 little pill 1 hour before I drink and poof, I’m cured and able to drink like a “normal person”?
I thought this was way too good to be true so I originally completely discounted this.
Eventually though I became so desperate, as if I wasn’t already desperate enough, and I said to myself that if I didn’t try it, it wasn’t going to work for me, but if I did, it just may work for me.
So, I set out to try it! You would think that this would be my happily ever after, but it wasn’t because I had such barriers to be able to even try it.
I went to my family doctor and after I told her everything I just shared with you above, she told me to keep a drink log and if I had 1 drink or 2, to just stop because I didn’t have to keep drinking more. She told me, “I just don’t think you need medication.”
I insisted on speaking to a doctor that was higher up in the practice because I am that person who will keep advocating for myself, my kids and husband, friends, clients, etc. to get what they need.
The clinical director of the practice walked in and said to me that she thought I was trying to go through the back door for treatment.
I went to another doctor’s office to a doctor who had been very helpful to me in the past and she said that I was trying to be my own doctor and treat myself.
I then went to another doctor’s office and they also refused to prescribe me the medication I needed and eventually told me to get out of their office.
I Eventually Found Someone Who Would, I Was Able to Recover In Just 3 Short Months & Have Stayed Recovered Ever Since
I was so discouraged at this point because I was still struggling terribly with alcohol, I was a brand new mother at the time, and on top of all that a single mother struggling to afford my basic necessities and with no support whatsoever.
I eventually found a doctor who would prescribe me the medication I needed, but he didn’t take health insurance so I had to pay him out of pocket.
So I did what I had to, I robbed Peter to pay Paul, I took from my rent money and paid this doctor, got my prescription, got my medication and I recovered in just 3 short months and I have stayed recovered ever since.
There were some things along the way I had to figure out and troubleshoot, but I was able to figure them out and successfully troubleshoot unlike the nearly a decade I could not no matter what I did and how hard I tried.
I Learned That Nothing Was Wrong With Me, That Something Is Terribly Wrong With Our System Because People Are Likely to Not Succeed Under Its Mainstream Approach, But That There is a MUCH Better Way to Help the Majority of People If Not Most
After I recovered I had questions. I wanted to know if there was something wrong with me, if I was weak, defective, selfish and all the things people tell you if alcohol is becoming a problem in your life and you can’t moderate your alcohol consumption or abstain entirely through nothing but sheer willpower.
I went on to earn 2 graduate degrees, 1 in Research & Analysis and the other in Child Advocacy & Policy and I realized that there was nothing wrong or flawed with me, but that instead there is something very wrong and flawed with our mainstream alcohol recovery system.
I learned that out of everyone who struggles with alcohol:
Only 10 out of 100 people even seek help
These 10 out 100 people wait on average 10 years before even seek help
Only 1 out of 10 actually get formal help
Not many of those 1 out of 10 are truly able to recover and long term and for those who are, their quality of life is not great because they struggle from strong and obsessive thoughts and cravings for alcohol all day, every day with no line of defense other than to white knuckle it and fear because they know what will happen if they pick up another drink
Our system is setting those who need help up for failure and then it further psychologically abuses them by telling them that they are just weak, bad people, etc. for not being successful at an approach to recovery that is bound to fail for the majority of people.
I also learned that there are alternative paths to alcohol recovery that completely flip these statistics on their head and instead help someone to have more of a likelihood than not of truly recovering and with ease.
I went on from being a survivor of childhood trauma and alcohol addiction to becoming a Speaker and the Creator of She’s Recovered and now I help women who have survived trauma and alcohol addiction truly heal so they can get to living the amazing life waiting for them on the other side! I help women find the path of alcohol recovery that actually works for them!
This Is For You Too!
If you are struggling and failing miserably under our system’s mainstream approach, it’s not your fault. There is so much hope for you. There is a path of healing for you. Let’s find it!
I have a gift for you!
It's called 3 Ways to Reframe Alcohol Recovery.
Not being able to find the path of alcohol recovery that actually works for you, struggling with strong and obsessive thoughts and cravings for alcohol all day every day until you finally give in and drink way too much and cannot stop, and in this endless cycle that repeats itself over and over again can leave you feeling hopeless.
In this complimentary resource I share exactly how after suffering for nearly a decade, in this same cycle, under our system's mainstream approach to alcohol recovery I was finally able to find an alternative path of recovery, recover in just 3 short months and stay recovered ever since. Now I help other women do the same!